Hello readers. It has been 4 months since my last blog post. It has been of time of healing emotionally from the events of Oct 1st. It has given me time to find a place of calm (something that seems to have become a theme in my life). During this time I have seen how family and friends respond to something traumatic and it has been eye opening. Also during this down time I made the decision to write a book but again, I needed to find the right time to break through my writers block and Valentine’s Day, a day of love for many, felt like the right time to crack open my thoughts and complete this story. I promise that I will complete what I have started but today I turn to all things “Love” related. Today is just another day for me. Just like the past 12 years, there has not been flowers, cards, romantic dinners or a call or text saying “I love you”. I know I speak on behalf of so many like me when I tell you it becomes hard to watch it all unfold on social media. It leaves you questioning how you have become so unlovable that it makes you salty. Have I not given enough love to others? Was I a horrible person in a past life? Why am I so defective that cupid’s arrow has flown past me? I have seen so many others go through divorce and move on to healthy and happy relationships. I am left to speculate more than ever on just this one day every single year. Is it I that am flawed?
Yesterday kind of changed my thought process a little bit about this stupid cupid day. How dare anyone tell us that we are loved more on February 14th than any other day of the year!! Aren’t we supposed to love someone like this every day of the year? Here’s what I think. I don’t ever want to be with someone that needs to take their cue of professing their love for me on only one day a year. I want that love to be a constant and it doesn’t have to be announced with flowers, cards or candy. A simple gesture every day adds up to 365 days of “I love you enough to tell you every day for forever” I, in turn will reciprocate that love 365 days. Valentines Day is not the great equalizer of love. What you do on February 15th, 16th, 17th, etc….is what really matters more.
I had the privilege of having lunch with a dear friend yesterday. I cannot share her story because it is her story. All I can say is that her year was more traumatic than mine but she still moves on with her life surrounded in love. She gifted me with a piece of art work. Two beautiful little silver fish to hang on my wall. She knows I am a Pisces and she understands I swim deep in emotion and she thought enough to bring this gift to me. Even through her difficult times, she thought of me when we arranged to meet. The gesture was beautiful. Then the second beautiful gesture revealed itself. Another woman who has been reading my blog reached out to me. She lives in California and she wanted me to know she understands my story. Here’s the amazing part. She wants to gift me something that is truly so beautiful. Something she sells. I was blown away by the gesture.
THAT is love 365 days a year. THAT is what we should aspire to. Whether it comes to you from a friend or the kindness of strangers (who become new friends), that is the love that is genuine.
For those of you in loving relationships I challenge you after today to just offer that gentle reminder daily to that other person. I promise the results will be life changing and your heart will be more full than ever.
To those two amazing women that touched my heart yesterday….I will not forget your kindness. Now to pay it forward.
Happy Valentines Day – aka Wednesday ❤
Now on to the rest of this story!!